My Taste Is Better Than Yours » gremlin

If you can’t beat them, join them

gremlin — Sun, 30 May 2010 12:37:18 +0000

So I kind of love the World Cup, partly because it’s guaranteed to make a nation of men cry baby tears when England inevitably fail to reach the semi-finals despite the News of the World crowing on about the fact that they’re definitely going to win this time and they have to return to the glory days of 1966 because otherwise rainbows will die.

But I also love it because, and I’m going to have to make a shameful confession here, although I possess that chronic illness known as football obsession (yes, even the stats), I also love football culture. I love WAGs. I love that massive gangle Peter Crouch and his beautiful lady Abbey Clancy and the fact that they have, somewhat remarkably, lasted (TRUE LOVE). I love the wedges and maxi dresses. I love footballers in their civvies and their attempts to express themselves through awful denim last seen in Diesel in 2001. I love their hairbands. I love them when they’re pissed and for reminding me that China White still exists. I love that when Nicky Bendtner got thrown out of Boujis he covered up his face BUT DIDN’T PULL HIS TROUSERS UP. I love Jose Mourinho because he is a total silver fox even though he is really short.

Yes, Jose, short. But you’re still a silver fox.

Definitely not short are the Danish team, who I also love because aside from the amusement provided by no-pants Nicky B, Daniel Agger is one hot piece. Unfortunately a recently married hot piece, but that needn’t affect my appreciation for his freckles, numerous (crap) tattoos and commitment to base layers. Okay I just googled ‘Daniel Agger freckles’ (don’t judge, okay?) and made a face at my computer a bit like Jose’s in the picture above because there is slash fan fiction involving him and Torres. (Sample sentence: ‘Fernando wouldn’t even admit it to himself, but when he saw the almost shy smile on Dan’s usually so tough face, the butterflies in his stomach started swirling like they were on crack.’) I’m a little bit wowed by the imagery of crackhead butterflies, but I think even for a freckle fanatic like me this is a step in thousand league boots too far.

Right, I’m off to drink some prosecco, do my nails and re-read the entire archive of Kickette, and then I’m going to input all the Denmark games into my BlackBerry calendar and take a moment to wonder at the miracle of Xabi Alonso’s mere existence (and his ginger beard). And if I still haven’t convinced you to embrace the sport in all its ample-thighed glory, maybe this picture of Crouchy wearing a penguin costume will.

All hail baby … squid Jesus?

gremlin — Wed, 23 Dec 2009 10:38:05 +0000

More nativity scenes to make Baby Jesus cry.

‘Tis the season to be merry. Very merry

gremlin — Tue, 22 Dec 2009 23:52:12 +0000

Sjalalalalala gefðu í

gremlin — Sun, 13 Dec 2009 13:55:09 +0000

In our kitchen we have a tape player. In our house we only have one tape – the soundtrack to The Little Mermaid. On a not entirely unrelated note, fandubs of Disney songs are a resource of amazingness I wasn’t previously aware of. That’s all changed now, though, and I have spent the past while enjoying various translations of ‘Kiss the Girl’ in one browser window, while doing some research on the Austrian hotness that is Christoph Waltz in the other. Disney and Nazis. Nice.

It’s hard to pick a favourite but how can you fail to be charmed by a Icelandic man singing as a crab singing in a reggae style?

I thought I would never watch Inglourious Basterds because of the extra ‘u’ and Brad Pitt’s bizarre overacting in the trailer (like I am determined never to watch Sweeney Todd. Sometimes I feel like the only girl in the world who neither finds Johnny Depp attractive nor a particularly amazing actor), but then I realised that he’s not in it much and instead there are lots of attractive German men in it (Michael Fassbender is half German, also counts). So now I’m watching it with a hangover and will rate it solely on the mens. Currently considering watching it on mute.

Want Lego Tom Riddle please

gremlin — Thu, 10 Dec 2009 07:52:20 +0000

Vintage unf

gremlin — Tue, 08 Dec 2009 22:53:46 +0000

Courtesy of Jean-Pierre Leaud, his cigarettes and his shifty-eyed beaky-nosed visage.

Never indulge any curiosity you might have about what he looks like now. Believe me, it’s better this way. Much, much better.

Once upon a time there was Kenzo, a lovely schnoz and a winter palette

gremlin — Wed, 25 Nov 2009 21:34:27 +0000

Love

this

editorial.

Perfect

autumn/winter

transition/feeling.

Well hello there

gremlin — Thu, 19 Nov 2009 03:35:29 +0000

I see your cheeky bow tie, Paul.

Now who can tell me what the maypole represents?

gremlin — Tue, 17 Nov 2009 23:40:06 +0000

In the woods there grew a tree. And a fine, fine tree was he.

I see you, Daily Mail

gremlin — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 22:17:41 +0000

“Channel 4’s latest attempt to seduce us with a mixture of swearing and sex comes in the form of True Blood, the latest in the long line of sexually explicit, violent and vulgar programmes that have, sadly, become the norm on British television. True Blood is a shocking tale of depravity, explicit sexuality (bordering on pornography) and vile language.”

“More offensive than all this is the sheer distasteful nature of the content. There’s oral sex, overt discussion of genitalia, graphic sex scenes and foul language.”

BUT THE CHILDREN.